An update - what has been going on...

[stellar_muddle]

I have been rather sporadic in the postings lately, so to give a bit of an update (and for a bit more of a blog feel rather than terse Facebook postings)...
For those not following Facebook...
I am 13 weeks pregnant. 12 week scan was last week and the ultrasound was all good.

Things appear to have calmed down now, in that in contrast to the previous ~6 weeks, this past week has not been filled with nausea and a complete and utter lack of energy. Hurrah !!! That timed awfully well with presenting at a conference in Adelaide last week. It had not combined well with things like DA and friends wedding last month... Hence some projects ended up being far less advanced than their initial intentions.

I may start calling for suggestions later re specific recommendations eg for (cloth) nappies (sources/make your own?) etc, but for now:

What links/books do people recommend?
So far I have been looking at*:
Conception, Pregnancy and Birth by Miriam Stoppard
and various websites, including giggling at the fruit size comparison - apparently we are now at "peach".

There have been others hit on by random searching.

I have had "Oh Baby" by Kathy Fray recommended as an NZ take on things.

Any other suggestions?

* Cause I always get annoyed at people who ask for blanket info without indicating they have made some effort to find some of their own first...

Comments

[thelancrewitch.livejournal.com]

Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering by Sarah Buckley is a great book. Also The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer. Both are well-researched (Buckley is a GP) looks at pregnancy and birth interventions and options. For parenting, the Sears' Baby Book was hugely helpful after I had the BatPup.

If you are interested in homebirth and/or attachment parenting, with a feminist perspective, and have time for a forum, come and say hi at Joyous Birth.

And congratulations again! I'll give you the only piece of advice I ever give to prospective parents, which is: ignore all the advice and do what feels right to you. Enjoy the adventure :)

[splodgenoodles.livejournal.com]

Wow, congratulations!

[sacred-chao.livejournal.com]

I recommend a good long exchange in the medium of your choice with mrsbrown who has vast experience with all of the above.

[bloodrage.livejournal.com]

Cloth vs. disposables is basically a trade between your time (and water) and your money (and disposal/landfill).

A big stack of http://www.fuzzibunz.com/ works for ours. The wee ones are good for the first three to six months. Niamh was in the mediums until house trained at two and a half. We have about 30 odd for the boys, I think we managed with 16 for Niamh. Plan on using 10-5 per day. Some of hers are still being used. Get some good old fashioned Naval Stripe cloth as well, use them for anything you need to wipe up, soak up, cover, strain, wrap, and drain. Keep disposables on hand and in the car. We went through only two packs with Niamh, maybe a half dozen so far with the boys.

You and Him will be doing laundry daily. Babies make as much laundry daily as you will in a week. Get a new (yes new, you want the warrantee) washing machine, a big one (8-9l washload). Get a dryer, one that senses when it's done. You'll figure out why when you have to wash everything in the house one weekend rain or shine.

We also changed to the Eco laundry powder with no fragrances or conditioners (conditioner buggers the microfleece liners of the fuzzibuns, and our kids' are randomly sensitive to fragrances) and the Napisan Babycare soak.

Modern detergents, napisan (oxygen bleach), and sun or dryer pretty much does in for the bacteria. You can pretty much consider those naval stripe nappies sterile enough to eat off.

We also recommend http://www.brollysheets.com/ two should do. Niamh and the boys slept directly on them and they don't crinkle. They also do mattress, duvet and pillow protectors.

Huggies wipes, we buy them in the 240 packs, which last until you see them on special again (even with twins). We seem to use less of them than the others too.

We found these too late http://www.skjp.com/nz/product/97556/150XX/_/Monterey%26%238482%3B_Booster which will do from birth all the way up. The clip in capsules are great too for the first six months, hire one from plunket.

Finally, no plan survives contact with the enemy. Whatever you want to do (birthing, feeding, nappies, the car you like to drive) will have to adapt to what comes.

[bloodrage.livejournal.com]

...oh, and suddenly you'll want a car less than 15 years old.

[mmy-me.livejournal.com]

totally agree with Aaron about the washing. You won't have known washing until you have kids.

Also agree with Lancrewitch - trust your gut. Take lots of advice, smile and thank, and then go with what you think is right. Nobody will know your baby like you do. That's not to say that people with experience can't help you recognize the unknowns at times. Don't be afraid to ask - when I had to change my first nappy I had to ask the nurses which way was front! Beat putting it on backward though!

Your life will never be the same. Be prepared! You will change too. This can be very disconcerting to others.

If you need a dryer, we have a 5kg one going which does a full laundry load if you take out the delicates. Yes, that was on purpose. :-)

Also good point about the car. The car breaking down takes on epic connotations when you have a baby in the back seat.

Totally go with the Plunket carseat to start with, but then invest in something that will last right through.

Finally: it's not that hard. Be pragmatic, all your plans and principles will go out the window the moment you clap eyes on the little guy. Accept that things are going to be chaotic, and random, and not fit in any of the standard 'types' you read about in book, and enjoy the ride. It's amazing, and great, and funny and tragic all at once: you can't beat it for thrills.

Finally: give up all expectation of personal space. You won't have any anymore. The baby will be in your bubble at all and any time. Also, during your pregnancy and post-birth random people may prod you in places you've only been prodded by intimate invitation before - you will have little dignity at times.

[evildrakey.livejournal.com]

For baby naming suggestions, I suggest this site http://www.notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/ for all your baby naming needs...

[thesane.livejournal.com]

Congratulations! A quick note on nappies - if you want to use flannel flat nappies I would recommend visiting any Baby Factory shops you can and checking for Infantino Supreme ones. They're Indian rather than Chinese, and the quality difference is astounding. Unfortunately,they don't seem to be restocking them (asfar as we can tell).